Questionable Wisdom: The Bigger Half

A bigger half and a smaller half

Once upon a time, there was an enormous chocolate chip cookie. My mom wouldn't let me have the whole thing because I was only seven years old. So mom broke it in half and let me choose which piece I wanted. And so, like any sensible seven-year-old, I chose the bigger piece.

The bigger half.

And this is where my grandpa comes into the story. He's a stickler about grammar and proper word usage. Every time I chose my bigger half of the cookie, he corrected me. And he's been correcting me on this ever since:

There's no such thing as a bigger half. If either piece is bigger, neither is a half.

As annoying as this is, it's actually kind of profound.